Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Driving Woes...

"Latest excuse for driving 80 mph in wrong lane? Texting"

Texting and driving? Can you say stupid idea?

Interesting combination of idiot actions here. It's bad enough to not pay any attention to the road because you are text messaging your girlfriend sweet nothings in her phone (allegedly, maybe he was breaking up with her? Maybe she was a he and he was his boyfriend? Who the hell knows...) then you add on the fact that you are drunk makes it even more ridiculous. Then you add driving down the wrong lane of traffic at 80 miles an hour to the recipe and you have the makin's for a big ol' mess on the road. Most likely your splattered head on the pavement.

I really do think that people are way too distracted on the roads these days. If it is not cell phones, it's your iPod. If it's not your iPod it's your DVD player. If it's not your DVD player it's your navigation device. If it's not that it's you picking your nose and so on...Whatever happened to the fucking radio and getting directions before you left the damn house? Is it too much to ask that you take the 2 minutes you need to look up the directions or make that VERY IMPORTANT phone call or watch that Miley Cyrus movie before you leave the fucking house?

And why do we need a DVD player above the dashboard of a vehicle. Isn't that just inviting the prospect of a severe flaming inferno of a head-on crash to happen? I suppose next we'll have to wear weird glasses or some sort of headgear to watch 3-D movies while we drive. One's that allow us to split our vision in half- one eye on the road and one eye on the yo-yo that goes up and down in the movie (a regular 3-D go to effect). Perhaps then, someone will invent a device that splits our attention as well?

The other day we were driving to go out to eat and I saw this women with a fucking Whopper in one hand, a cigarette in the other and her head cranked to the side holding the cell phone to her ear oh and yes - SHE WAS DRIVING AT THE SAME TIME! The only thought that came to mind was that this is why people get killed on the roads. This is why our insurance rates are astronomical. If she had to make a sudden stop what was she going to do? Throw down the burger, stomp out her cigarette and put the person on hold first? Amazing...

I must admit there is one thing that garners my attention every time I see it and that is someone so wrapped up in fishing that big ass booger out of their nose they lose all sense of reality and forget that they are on the road. I guess the only reason why I am watching is to see if they eat it. And sometimes I'm not disappointed...

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I SAW SOMEONE WHO HAD ONE OF THEIR FEET OUT OF THE DRIVER'S SIDE WINDOW WHILE DRIVING ONCE. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?

Anonymous said...

Do we really need to watch movies in the car? What ever happened to the game "Punch Bug" or "I Spy"? Are we that fucking clueless that we can't sit in a vehicle for a relatively short period of time without the TV on?

Pugs said...

@ Anon: ?????? How the hell were they sitting?

@ Car: Punch bug was a fun game but could get a little violent. My cousin used to beat the shit out of us when we played. I would have rather have watched TV than get knocked out.

Anonymous said...

IT LOOKED LIKE THEY WERE KIND OF LYING BACK IN THE SEAT A BIT AND HAD THEIR LEFT FOOT RESTING ON THE DRIVERS SIDE MIRROR. I'M SURPRISED THE COPS DIDN'T PULL THEM OVER.

Metro said...

Oh Jesus ... Do not get me started. I used to drive truck for a living.

I once saw a guy in a souped-up low-riding Honda with the coffee-can muffler driving in the commuter lane (two persons or more): No passenger--that was bad enough.

Then he had to smoke his tires to stop for bridge approach traffic, and as I pulled up I could see that he had those head-rest-mounted video displays. One of them was turned to face the driver's seat, and he was clearly watching.

That sort of behaviour is the sole reason I ever rethink my opinion on gun control. I believe that anyone with a clean license should be allowed to shoot two tires off of anyone driving HUA (Head Up Ass).

My personal favourite idea is traffic control through random sniping: At any given time there are two to ten police snipers working the overpasses and lanes of your home state/province, depending on population.

At any time, if you violate the rules of the road, they can pop off a round either at your vehicle or at you.

@Anonymous--don't knock them. I once was entertained by a hot, nude-from-the-waist-down redhead who adopted that pose from roughly Bakersfield to Redding, CA--made my day go by a lot quicker, I tellya.

And no, it wasn't distracting, not after the first couple of minutes, anyway. After that it was just a pleasant bit of scenery.